Brainspotting for boundary setting:How therapy can help you find your inner ‘No.’
1. The Power of Saying No: How Brainspotting Therapy Helps You Set Healthy Boundaries
When you experience trauma, it could feel like your power and control have been taken away from you. Your voice feels silenced, your body feels weaker, your mind feels unstable. You walk around experiencing fear, you no longer want to engage with the people or places that used to bring you joy. You might end up feeling like a shadow of your former self- or having no knowledge of who you used to be.
This is where a great trauma therapist in Houston can help you. As we work together, you can relearn how to feel safe again, how to get rid of those thoughts that tell you that something bad is going to happen to you again. You can learn how to feel safe in your body again, and most importantly, how to find your voice.
When I use brainspotting to help you get rid of trauma that has been sitting in your body and in your brain, a big part of our work will be learning how to set clear, healthy boundaries that not only keep you safe, but help you connect to safe people around you. You can live life on your terms, stay safe and finally thrive again. A skilled trauma therapist in Houston can help you confidently establish personal boundaries.
2. Breaking Free from People-Pleasing: Using Brainspotting to Reclaim Your Voice
Many of my clients are really nice women. I also consider myself to be a compassionate Black therapist in Houston. Now the great thing is that being nice and setting boundaries can coexist quite nicely (pun intended). Many of my clients feel so horrible when they have to say “No” to others. They would much rather sacrifice themselves and be uncomfortable, instead of simply saying “No” and moving on with their day.
I get it.
Because you don’t want anyone to think you are mean or that you don’t care about them. You don’t want to be disliked, challenged or even for someone to be mean to you in retaliation.
The great thing about brainspotting is we can go deeper than traditional talk therapy. So we essentially go into deeper parts of your brain, where the stuck-ness is held and it can help rewire that stuff.
You’ll learn what boundaries you need and how you can establish them regardless of what people think. And yes, you get to keep your kindness. Because boundaries, in my opinion, should be clear AND kind. A compassionate Black therapist in Houston (that’s me!) can guide you to say “No’ without too much guilt.
3. Finding Freedom in Boundaries: How Brainspotting Supports Highly Sensitive People
When you are a high performing, highly sensitive woman, you want to move at a fast pace, so that you can accomplish everything you have going on, but sometimes you might not have the bandwidth to do it all- because your brain spends so much energy deeply processing the world within and around you.
This means that the only choice you have is to learn how to set appropriate boundaries with your time, with your friends, with your coworkers and with yourself. Because if you say “Yes” to all the people about all the things, you will eventually reach a horrible stage of burnout that feels like your shouders being crushed.
So think about boundary setting as a great way to practice kindness to yourself- allowing you the bandwidth to accomplish the things that are actually essential in your life- rather than wasting time of activities that bring you no joy and add nothing to your long term goals.
Brainspotting will help you connect to deeper parts of your brain so that you can remove the blocks that keep you from saying “No.” It could help you learn how to break free from trauma and anxiety that keep you stuck and silenced. The outcome? Boundary setting becomes so much easier for high performing, highly sensitive women like you.
4. Creating Space for Yourself: Brainspotting as a Tool for Healthy Relationship Boundaries
When trauma has been blocking your brain, it feels like you are paralyzed. But once that trauma has been cleared up, you are now ready to begin to redefine the boundaries in your life. If you feel like you are stuck when boundary setting, you could also use brainspotting to help you find your stuck points, so that you can begin to communicate with more clarity.
If you struggle in saying '‘No,” brainspotting can help with that. If you struggle to say what you actually mean, it could help as well. Because without clear, gentle boundaries you’ll continue to feel frustrated.
5. Discover Your Inner “No”: Empowering Boundary Setting with a Trauma Therapist in Houston
A big part of my work of trauma therapy in Houston is teaching you how to empower yourself to set firm boundaries. A firm boundary is one that sticks to the rules. Too tired? Don’t do it. Doesn’t feel nice? Tell them.
A life of freedom isn’t so concerned about what others think. Rather you are concerned about creating health, space and joy in your life. Effective boundary setting respects both you and the people around you. And once you have been able to identify who the safe people in your life are, thing just become easier for you.
With brainspotting, you connect better to your own feelings, without worrying too much about what social norms say you should do. You can still maintain being a respectful and kind person, while honoring your needs. A win win!
Ready to Embrace Your Boundaries? Connect with a Black Therapist in Houston Today
Take the first step toward finding your “No” and nurturing healthier relationships. Start your journey with Brainspotting therapy, designed to help you set empowering boundaries with ease. Click here to schedule your free 15-minute consultation call for brainspotting therapy in Houston. I also see clients throughout California.
About Me
My name is Ibinye Osibodu-Onyali. I’m a licensed marriage and family therapist in California and Texas. I help women who are struggling with trauma, anxiety and insomnia.
I also help couples learn how to speak each other’s language, date each other again and manage conflict in a non-painful way.
Many of my clients are: