How do you know when you're drowning in overwhelm?

So often I hear people say, "I'm overwhelmed." In the moment it might feel like a quick avalanche that just sneaked up on you. But in reality, overwhelm is more like slow moving lava. It inches closer and closer and closer until you are knee deep in hot, fiery flames and you have nowhere to run. You get stuck and you have no clue how this happened.

 To avoid the hot trap, it's important to realize the warning signs that point to the fact that you are indeed overwhelmed. Take a closer look at your life. How does your appearance change when it starts to creep in? Maybe you stop wearing lipstick or mascara. Maybe you start to pull your hair in a bun instead of combing it out.

How does overwhelm creep in at work? Does your desk get messy? Do you stop socializing with coworkers? Do you yawn more or do you slack off? Or maybe you cram in every single task possible without taking lunch breaks.

How does overwhelm show up in your relationships? Do you pick fights with your partner or do you isolate yourself? Are you snapping at your kids for pouring milk on the floor or chewing too loudly?

 Are your relationships changing? Are you isolating yourself? Are you yelling more or are you becoming more cranky? Do you not feel like going to dinners? Ask your spouse or partner what he notices when things are getting difficult for you.

It's important to notice how overwhelm sneaks in-the gentle warning signs. Once you notice your hair going up in a bun, its time to start letting go of the things that might lead you to overwhelm. Take a break, do some yoga, talk to a friend- or a therapist. Pause so you can take a detour before the lava sucks you in. If you don't slow down, the lava it will sneakily creep its way into your life until you're burned into ashes. 

How will you stop overwhelm in its tracks today? To schedule a free 15-minute phone consultation with me, call 951-905-3181. During this consultation, we will talk about what's going on with you, what my therapy style is and how I may be able to help you find your calm and avoid the lava.

5 tips to reduce anxiety

You know that uncomfortable feeling. It's the pit in your stomach, the thoughts that run through your head and prevent you from getting a good night's sleep. It's anxiety. Here are 5 things you can do to reduce overwhelm in your daily life:

1) Know your limit: If you're anything like most ambitious women, you'll find that your plate is always piled high with activities from the moment you wake up, until the moment you sleep. Know that you only have 24 hours in a day. Learn to add only about 5 items on your to do list and either delegate other tasks, or save them for another day.

2) Plan ahead: Many people feel anxious when they have to cram 25 tasks into 1 day. One day a week, sit with a blank calendar and write out every single task you want to accomplish during the week. When you've done that, pencil in each item during the week so that your entire week will be planned without hassles and headaches.

3) Ask for help:So of course we would all like to think of ourselves as super heroes. Well you know what? Every super hero has her kryptonite. Ask for help when you need it. If dishes need washing, ask your teenagers to help you. If you need to pick milk up from the store, ask your spouse to do it. There's no shame in that.

4) Schedule regular self care:If you're always on the go and always in work mode, you stand the risk of overworking yourself. Schedule at least 10 minutes each week to unwind and relax. Do something simple like sipping a cup of tea, spending some time alone in silence or even sneaking in a quick nap. Your mind and your body will thank you.

5) Put things in perspective:When things aren't going your way, do you focus on what is going wrong or do you shift your mind to the things that do go right? In a moment of overwhelm, it's really easy to focus on unfinished tasks. In that very moment, slow down, breathe and remind yourself about your wins and accomplishments. Stop whatever you're doing and come back to it when you're in a better mood. You'll thank yourself.

What can you do to reduce anxiety today? If you'd like us to work together to reduce anxiety and overwhelm, schedule a consultation with me at 951-905-3181.