How to find a Black Therapist: A simple step by step guide

2020 was quite an interesting year. It was the first time we experienced a pandemic. We had lockdowns, global unrest, economic upheaval, lockdowns, social distancing, mask wearing, hullabaloo about vaccines, virtual schooling, telecommuting, a presidential election…the list goes on and on.

Now that we have crossed over into a new year, maybe you find yourself feeling more anxious than usual. Maybe you toss and turn every night and you just can’t sleep. Or maybe 2020 was the year that brought chaos into your marriage. All that time spent working virtually and home schooling your kids has taken a toll on you.

You’re certainly NOT alone. Maybe it’s time to talk to a therapist. There is an erroneous belief that Black people and other people of color don’t go to therapy. But that certainly is NOT true.

You’ve thought about seeing a therapist, but you’re not sure where to go or who to call. Let’s face it, finding a mental health therapist in the Murrieta/Temecula area or in Riverside County for that matter, can be a BIG struggle. 

You search ‘Black mental health therapist near me’ and you’re rewarded with 100 options. You look through the first 20, call 10, and you’re greeted by voicemail after voicemail. Your head begins to spin because you don’t even know who the right choice is. Some of the therapists ask you to schedule a consultation call, but you have no clue what that even means or what to say during said call. You know you want a Black therapist, but you’re not sure if that’s appropriate to think or ask for.

I’m here to simplify the process. As a Black therapist in Riverside County- who sees clients virtually throughout California, clients tell me all the time how hard it was to wade through all the options just to find me.

So here it goes- my step by step guide of how to find a Black therapist.

Think about what you need from a therapist

Before you make the first call, take a moment to ask yourself, “What do I need from my Black therapist?” This might be an odd question, but it’s important to note that every therapist cannot help you. You won’t automatically connect with every therapist you speak to- regardless of gender, ethnicity, location, cost, specialty, etc.

• Do you want a therapist who engages in traditional talk therapy in which both of you engage in a series of interventions that include talking?

• Do you want a therapist who digs into your past and uncovers past pain and trauma? Or do you prefer to stay present focused?

• Are you particular about the therapist’s religious background and do you want that religion or spirituality included in the therapy process?

• Do you want a therapist of a specific gender?

• Do you want a therapist who is more formal, or one who is casual, laid back, humorous and always has a head wrap to match her shirt?

• Are you looking for long term therapy or something more short term?

• What specific issues are you looking for help with? Can the therapist treat those issues? For example: trauma, infidelity, substance use, anxiety, depression, insomnia, couples counseling. Many therapists do specialized work.

Ask your friends, family members or loved ones for a referral

One of the easiest ways to find a Black therapist is simply to ask those around you. Chances are you have friends and loved ones who are either currently in therapy, who have been in therapy before or who know someone who knows a Black therapist (I promise you that we exist).

If you have other Black friends or loved ones of color- go ahead and ask them. Ask them what makes that therapist a great therapist, what the therapist’s style is, and possibly, what issues the therapist treats. It’s always great to get an insider referral. By the way, it’s okay if you and your friends see the same therapist- as long as you and the therapist do not feel it’s a conflict of interest.

I can assure you that going to therapy is so much more common than you think. Because therapy happens in a confidential setting, we often think that we are the only ones who go to therapy. Let me fill you in on a little secret- even therapists go to therapy. We are in the business of helping others and also receiving help.

Do a Google search for ‘Black Therapist near me.’

Yup, sometimes it’s as easy as that. Good old Google is at your service when you need it. Due to the pandemic, so many more therapists have gone virtual, so you can easily see a therapist that might not be geographically near you, but is located in your state.

The way therapy licenses are regulated in the United States, we are licensed to practice therapy throughout our states. That means if you live in California, you can see any therapist within California, but you can’t see a therapist who is licensed in Georgia or Florida for example (except the therapist is licensed in multiple states).

When you do a Google search, I always suggest that you visit the therapist’s website, spend time reading the website, notice what the specialties are, and ask to schedule a free consultation call. Not all therapists offer this, but it never hurts to ask. Also search therapists in nearby cities, just to broaden your options. So, if you live in Riverside County, you can search ‘Black therapist in Los Angeles,’ ‘Black therapist in San Diego,’ or even ‘African American therapist near me.’

Use a Therapist or Mental Health Directory

If you don’t feel like asking your loved ones for a referral and Google seems too overwhelming, you’re in luck. There are quite a lot of therapist directories out there. Some are broad, and some are specific to therapists who serve communities of color, Latinx communities, Black clients or women.

Many of these directories have filters so that you can be very specific in your search. Here are a few therapist directories you could try.

• Therapy for Black Girls: A directory specifically for Black women who are looking for a therapist.

• Melanin and Mental Health: A directory serving Black and Latinx communities.

• Clinicians of Color Directory: A directory serving communities of color.

• Therapy Den: A directory helping to connect people to therapists.

• Psychology Today: One of the largest mental health service directories. It’s very broad and you can find a psychiatrist on here too.

Schedule a Free Consult With The Therapists You Find

After you have scanned through the directories and glanced over the therapists’ websites, create a short list of therapists who stand out to you. The best therapist for you is the therapist who you have a great connection with AND who is skilled in helping you meet your goals. This is a good time to trust your gut.

Not every therapist offers free consultation calls, but you can always ask for one. During the consultation call you can ask about their style of therapy, what types of clients they typically work with, if therapy is short or long term, and get a general sense of the therapist’s vibe. What vibe am I talking about? You’ll feel it when you talk to a few therapists.

There you have it- a simple step by step guide to finding a Black therapist in your city or state. 

If you are a successful Black woman in California, struggling with anxiety, insomnia or relationship problems, click here to schedule a free 15-minute consultation with me.

I’d love to talk to you about your struggles and see if we are a great fit for one another, so you can finally get back on the right track. If you want to find out more about me, you can read up all about me here.

Tips to Manage fear and anxiety during COVID-19

This year has definitely been a strange one. We started it celebrating the start of a new decade. I’m sure you had lots of hopes and dreams, vacation plans and all sorts of great goals. But then COVID-19 swooped in and attempted to take over our entire lives. We are currently in month 2 of social distancing. While that could sound bleak, it’s important to note that there is a lot of hope.

 For many, there has been quite a lot of anxiety and fear. After all, we aren’t used to staying away from our loved ones, wearing face masks and being in the middle of a global pandemic. If you are currently experiencing fear or anxiety, here are some tips to help you manage it.

Limit exposure to news and social media

The news is all around us, letting us know death counts, infection rates and giving us a minute by minute update. For some people, that information is helpful. But if you are already experiencing anxiety, a minute by minute update might not be what you need.

To help with this, watch the news in small doses. You don’t have to be glued to the TV 24/7. Just watch enough to be informed. Some people skip the news altogether. Do what works for you. But if you want to watch TV while skipping the news, you can watch a comedy show, a game show, an educational piece or even a cartoon. There are quite a lot of options out there.

Focus on what you can control

Social distancing is difficult. Let’s face it. We are not used to putting up such strong barriers to protect others from us or vice versa. Life used to be easy. We could just get into our cars and drive wherever we wanted, without even thinking about it. But lately we have to keep a physical distance from others and disinfect everything. While you might not have the answers to curing COVID-19, there is a lot you can control.

• You can control how often and how well you wash your hands.

• How you social distance.

• Your home environment.

• The memories you make within your home.

• How you react to this situation.

• The way you think about this situation.

• How you stay in contact with your loved ones (we might be physically distanced, but we can remain emotionally connected)

Take it day by day

When you struggle with anxiety, there is often a need to control the future. You worry about what the future holds and how you can prevent bad things from happening. Although you might not have the answers to COVID-19, take it one day at a time and focus on other things.

When you wake up in the morning, aim to make the best out of your day. Focus on getting through each day. And if getting through each day feels too long, focus on taking it minute by minute. Take care of your physical needs by scheduling sleep, adhering to a bedtime and wake up time and surround yourself with things you love. You can channel your energy into maintaining your space, work, crafts, connecting with loved ones and diving into your artistic side.

Protect your Kids

If you are a parent of young kids, it’s important to be mindful of what you say and watch around them. Kids don’t quite understand what they see and hear on TV. Watching death counts can be quite alarming to some kids. Ensure that you mix up your conversation. Although we might be in a pandemic, there are other topics to talk about. 

Engage with your kids like you used to before COVID-19. You can play with them, go on walks, have them help you around the house, and just be the loving parent that you are. Ensure that there is some semblance of structure to help them feel safe and secure. Kids will not remember all the fine details regarding the pandemic, but they’ll remember how they felt when they were in lockdown with you. 

Take care of yourself using positive coping

I always teach my clients the importance of having multiple coping skills in your tool box. Some coping skills that could help you manage anxiety during COVID-19 are deep breathing, progressive muscle relaxation, mindfulness exercises, prayer, positive affirmations, deep breathing and body scans. And if you like apps, Calm is my very favorite. You can use it to guide you with some of these skills. Here are some additional amazing tips about healthy habits you can practice without even leaving your home.

Maintain close bonds with your loved ones

I’m so glad that we are living in a technology age. Can you imagine if we were social distancing without phones or the internet? Although you might not be able to see some of your loved ones, you can call, text and video chat. Use your imagination and make it fun. 

• You can watch movies together

• Have a game night

• Tea time

• Family cooking competition

• Bible study

• Prayer night

• Virtual workout sessions

Use your imagination and have fun with it!

There you have it. Some simple ways to manage your anxiety and fear during the pandemic. And if you are a woman who is struggling with anxiety or insomnia, I’m currently seeing clients from all over California virtually. Call me on 951-905-3181 to schedule your free 15-minute consultation call so you can make anxiety and fear a thing of the past. You can also email me here.

Ready to ditch anxiety and fear?

Click to download the FREE e-book now.